Seize the Spray

It's August but I already know what I want in my Christmas stocking. Genkiwear has produced a line of Star Trek-inspired fragrances: Tiberius, Red Shirt, and Pon Farr.

The promotions are creative and somewhat demeaning to their potential customers. If you're not familiar with Star Trek, just know that "red shirt" has become a euphemism for someone who is expendable. Now the tag line "Because Tomorrow May Never Come" takes on new meaning. With these offerings, Genkiwear may be producing a line of nearly consumer-free products. I say "nearly" because of crazy trekkers like me who might just wear it anyway, as long as it doesn't give me a rash.

Note to Genkiwear: if you're looking for a spokesperson and both William Shatner and Chris Pine are unavailable, I suggest you call Simon Helberg.